Movie Review

Title; Lone Wolf and Cub; Baby Cart in Peril

Staring: Tomisaburo Wakayama, Akihiro Tomikawa, Yoichi Hayashi, Michie Azuma

Rating: 3.5 Indestructable baby-carts

Review: And we go again into round four.

There is a massive jump in events in comparison to what we are used to, but it does not change the flow of the story that much. Itto Ogami (Tomisaburo Wakayama) is sent after the assassin Oyuki (Michie Azuma), a woman with an interesting fighting style as we see in the opening credits. She is an assassin without a shirt, so that men are distracted by her breasts and the tattoos of a witch and her child. Itto is assigned to kill her. He has a word with the tattoo artist who is quite taken with her. He has had his way with her while tattooing her in a style that would have been most painful to anyone.

As the style of movie goes, there are two minor stories that somewhat interlink and a big fight at the end. Part one is dedicated to Gunbei Yagyu (Yoichi Hayashi) and his part to do with Itto Ogami’s past. Gunbei has defeated Itto in swordplay before, but there was a lot of interwoven politics and the like, and neither one killed or injured the other, but Gunbei was disgraced and smuggled away, entitled ‘a/the dead man’. He is watching Daigoro (Akihiro Tomikawa) and thinking him very brave, until he puts it all together that he is the child of the Lone Wolf. Engaging Itto in combat, he comes off second and loses his left arm, but Itto spares him, since he is already dead. Gunbei promises that he is going to be the one to kill Itto.

So Itto moves onto his goal. We learn that Oyuki is after a man who taught her sword-fighting. Since she could not defeat him years ago, he raped her. Now that she has new mastery in swordsmanship, she is going after him again. She has gone to a hot spring, where if you perform the rituals of seven days, your wish will be granted. But neither she nor Itto need to perform the rituals, for her target arrives just as she realises Itto has come to kill her. She kills her target by opening her kimono and exposing her breasts, which stun him and she puts a knife in his head and then in his stomach. Itto then kills her with honour.

Itto returns to Oyuki’s father with her ashes and there is suddenly a huge power struggle. Itto confronts the Daimyo (local lord) to confirm things, which lead to a fight and Itto taking the Daimyo hostage. And now the big fight at the end of the movie between Itto and Gagyu, which is nothing now.

Less taken away from this movie, and what I liked was that there is more and more focus on Daigoro, but also that we see that Itto is still mortal and will obtain injury, and possibly not survive. And when you are used to the style of movie that the Baby Cart series is, it becomes easier and easier to follow. But there was a scene that was shot in the dark, and it is very difficult to tell who is doing what where, and why Daigoro wasn’t struck down in the confusion (-.5) and if it had been remastered so it was understandable, I would be happy. But my copy isn’t that good as to pick out this detail.

The big fight at the end was very good, because it was different and (for the most part) believable. The odds weren’t that great (as they are in other films) and the fighting was rather detailed. And finally, a character who we know as a villain in the series actually fights Itto. I won’t say the results.

What got to me though was that the lead characters who clearly have fighting skill and should be something of a test to Itto’s fighting skill are becoming simpler to kill as time goes by. I know it is the symbol of an improved assassin, but the fights with major characters are very short-lived and very unfortunate. I had hoped for a better fight between Itto and Oyuki, but it is less than 15 seconds long for all the build-up it has. (-1).

Like all the other Baby Cart films, I will definitely watch this one again, as it is rather amusing for the most part, but also because the bond between Itto and Daigoro grows in this movie. The acting is superb when there is acting to be done. And s for the babycart itself, it now has folding bullet-prrof screens that give more cover and an advance on its guns. No surprises there.   

Title: Sleepy Hollow

Starring: Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Michael Gambon, Mark Pickering

Rating; 4 Flaming Pumpkin Heads

Review; A story that is spread through time and history. There has been more than one headless horseman throughout time and mythology, but you will find that this one is based solely on the original, somewhere north of New York.

Ichabod Crane (Johnny Depp) is a constable at the end of the 18^th century who is trying to develop the modern art of forensics. Not surprising that the people in power, torturers and bullies, don’t like the idea. To keep him quiet, they send him off to Sleepy Hollow to investigate three decapitations which is a slowly climbing number.

What Ichabod will discover over time is that he has stumbled into a spiritual phenomenon of the greatest proportions. Someone has called up the spirit of a ruthless german killer through the stealing of his skull from his grave. His spirit rides out to kill and claim heads. The plot will twist and turn many times before it comes to the final showdown.

I simply don’t want to reveal too much. The story is way too good to simply spill out like I usually do. Take as many guesses as you want at what happened before to create what is going to happen, but you will find yourself playing ‘Button, Button, Who’s Got the Button?’

This is the sort of film I have been itching to see from Tim Burton for a long time, and while I realise it has been available for some time forme to see, I had a hard time finding it. I grew up on Disney’s version of the story. It is more focused on the love of Ichabod and Katrina Van Tassel (Christina Ricci). The story simply ends with Ichabod, a school master, being spirited away by the Headless Horseman while riding home from a Halloween party. This version is a lot more in depth and in line with the time period it is set to.

But even this movie lost a point. What I didn’t like is how reflective it is of at the many editions of Sherlock Holmes it started to become. True that Young Masbath (Marc Pickering) could be Watson in a youthful disguise, but not in any great active way. But all up, it cost .5 of a point.

I took another half point off because the small side plot that looks into Ichabod’s past is both highly confusing and difficult to link to the main plot. One might think that the two are interlinked majorly for a long time, but in truth it is simply to remind Ichabod of who he is and where he comes form. Nice, I’m sure, but highly distracting.

This movie has certainly made the top list. Pushing Shortbus down to 6, and Mrs.Doubtfire is off the list completely. This thrill-ride of a film is definitely worth sitting down to again.

       

 

Title: Black Swan

Starring: Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, Vincent Cassel, Barbara Jershey.

Rating: 3 Black Swan Feathers

Review: My first note is that I have never been on LSD before, but by the time this movie is over, you are going to wonder where she is slipping it to herself, the way she goes on.

This is the story of Nina Sayers (Natalie Portman), who wants to be the lead in the ballet this year, and she has worked hard all her life to get there. Her overbearing Mother (Barbara Jershey) has every dream of her getting there and doing what she couldn’t do. As we learn, she gave up her career to have Nina.

As we learn, Nina is a very timid and cowed woman, who is rather weak when it comes to doing things for herself. Her producer, the French Thomas Leroy (Vincent Cassel) has great ambition for her success, if only she wasn’t so damned perfect in her movements. Thomas also wants to screw Nina because she is frigid, her movement is rigid and her self-expression screwed.

At the announcing night, Nina’s predecessor is present and she makes a bit of a public scene, and gets run over the next day, and we also know that Nina has been stealing her stuff. This sets of Nina’s guilt. This gets mixed with her need to be the perfect performer and Lily (Mila Kunis) is what one might consider the enemy, even though there really is none.

By the time the movie is over, it is far too difficult to make heads or tails of this movie, or even what genre it is under. But will it be Lily or Nina who gets to play the lead in Swan Lake, and is it worth screwing your boss to get there? If you are Lily, the answer is no, even if he is wandering around with his tongue down your throat and his hand down your pants half the time. Obsession is a major factor in all this.

When you sit down to a movie, you have a general idea of what it is going to be about, and that you can expect this here and that there. This film is very different, as you are never quite sure what to expect after a while, although more names would have been nice, since most of the girls look the same (generally speaking). I spent half the movie wishing Nina would just hit somebody and tell them where to go, and the list expands over time.

I took a point off because the movie is not very clear on what is happening to Nina. We know some of her history, we know she is stressed, but the short bathroom scene at the party made no sense and a number of the things going on afterwards are far too abstract to be considered as part of the plot. Is this The Exorcist or a movie length episode of The Days of Our Lives, I’m too dizzy from the jumping genres to tell.

I dubbed another point simply because Nina is a flat character until the very end, and when she does flip her lid, everyone is oblivious to it, and no one thinks to call in a C.A.T. team. Before she goes nuts she is simply weak person who can’t stand up to anyone til she has had a few drinks and a bit of something in her drink.

I’d watch this movie gain now that I understand it, but I’d really have to be in the mood. But that mood does not seem common to me right now.      

Title: Sherlock Holmes

Starring: Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law, Mark Strong,  Rachael McAdams

Rating; 4.5 Deductions of Logic

Review: Since watching the television series of a modern Sherlock Holmes, the movie could only get better. And seeing that there is a sequel, I think I’ll ignore my sequel rule this once to go and see it.

Anyway, the story begins with an introduction to this newer version of Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey Jr), who demonstrates exactly how fast he can think and deduce, as well as knock a man unconscious with a few brilliant strikes. This leads us to discover he is on the trail of a ritual killer with Dr. John Watson (Jude Law) not far behind him. With a successful arrest, Sherlock goes into unemployment for three months, while Watson is about it become engaged. This leads to a rather bad meeting and a ring fight with Sherlock again demonstrating his ability to think fast, deuce and kick arse.

Our main villain, Lord Blackwood (Mark Strong), is up to be hanged, and he warns Sherlock of three upcoming murders that he cannot hope to prevent, and they will change the world.

The challenge is on when Sherlock’s old rival and once heart-throb Irene Adler (Rachael McAdams) drops by. This is followed by a request to find a man. He is found in Blackwood’s grave and Blackwood is seen walking out of the graveyard. So the chase is on as people die, things get blown up and giant men with menacing looks and heavy hammers try to clobber Sherlock one.

Seriously, I can’t say too much because then I’ll rabbit on about how it all worked, and then you won’t want to see it, and considering it has just come onto my top ten list at number 2, knocking ‘The Colour Purple’ down one and eliminating ‘Baby-Cart at the River Styx’, you gotta think that I have a good feeling about this.

But a .5 was removed. So something went wrong somewhere. And basically, it is the wondering that how Dr. Watson came out of that explosion so well after only one nights recovery, and not a full night at that. He even admits to having dressed his own wounds. That is some doctor for 1891. But considering his role in the ending was minor, I don’t think I’m going to get too heavy on the details or speculations.

Go, my little children, go and see this film, if you have not. It is well worth it.  

Overall Top 10

1) Silent Hill (4.5) (Own)

2) Sherlock Holmes (4.5) (own)

3) The Colour Purple (4.5) (Own)

4) The Frightners (4) (Purchase)

5) The Prestige (4) (Own)

6) Sleepy Hollow (4) (own)

7) Shortbus (4) (Purchase)

8) The Addams Family (4) (Own)

9) Splinter (4) (Purchase)

10) Night of the Living Dead (4) (Own)