Plebiscite Experience

Hi all,
         So here we are in 2017, and we in Australia are falling behind the rest of the world in the Marriage Equality deal. Well, the western world where it is a more accepted practice anyway. I've been watching quietly for a while now as people have been having their say and battling it out in one way or another. Even though this is something that I want for others and myself, we are going through this nastier approach to the situation. Thank you Murmbull (Malcolm Turnbull) for your forethought on this. 
Now, I've had a very unique experience in this, and I've had a hard time trying to find people who can relate, much less sympathize, And it has been a lot more difficult because of how other people are reacting in some places. This is when I see people saying things like "If you Vote No, you can delete me from your Facebook" and that stupid approach in many ways. I find it foolish. Why does one opinion matter so much? if your best friend from years back voted against you, would you unfriend them? What if you couldn't remove people that easily? This whole "Us and them" idealism is stupid, and while we watch Donald Trump design walls between America and Mexico and laugh about it, a less practical yet still dividing set of events is taking place here. There is no difference, except the literal wall is now metaphorical. 
And the divide won't help anyone. We still need to live with each other, regardless of the outcome. So, No team: be prepared for same love to happen. Yes team: be prepared to have political and emotional backlash for a victory or defeat. In the meantime, choose your battles. I was disappointed when I saw a photo of posters from Yes voters that said "Fuck off and give us our rights!". Mhmm, because that's constructive. Respecting your opponent is a good way to get what you want without war. I know they might resort to a few dirty tricks, but that doesn't mean sinking to their level. And honestly, if I swore at you in such a manner to get something from you, do you honestly think you'd give it to me willingly and with a smile? I don't think so.
So my experience, a very deep and painful one that shook me very deeply. As you know, I work in Aged Care providing activities and emotional support to my residents. When you have been doing this very consistently for nearly 5 years, you become important to them, and they notice your absence. So when the voting slips came and I'm appointed the one to give them out, I gotta tell you it was difficult. I had to explain to the residents what it was about, what to do ad that if they needed help, I can answer questions, and all without providing a "Tick the yes box" suggestion. 
So, that can't be too bad. A far as they are concerned, I'm just being helpful, and this has no impact on me (because not all of them know I'm gay). The ones who do know voted Yes (by majority to my knowledge). That was great, and it was about the only thing that held me up for the day. Other residents, not so great. I had a few of them fill in their forms there and then in front of me, ticked No, discussing with each other that gays are less that worthy, then handing back the form to me to send. 
"That's okay Perry, just throw out the form, it won't make a difference." I got that a few times, and it is a good sign that people don't know me well. I cannot, in good conscience, stop people having their say. It is their entitlement and their right. What sort of person would I be to deny other people their rights in order to get mine? 
So the difficult part has been: how do you be nice to people who voted against you having the same rights as them? I can't remove them off my Facebook, I can't avoid them, I can't mistreat them. I have to continue living with them beyond this moment. I have to continue on as if nothing has happened, as if my heart wasn't ripped out of me by people I have a good relationship with, and keep on keeping on. The only way to get away from them is either a transfer or to quit my job. Not an option I will entertain at this point because I have little in the way of a fallback plan.
So this has been, and will be my experience; people in my life being able to say No to my face and me not being able to do anything about it. Now I say this in the knowledge that other people will go through hardships through this, and Deity knows I've heard some stories. I know people will suffer more than I have on this, and that is all very true. However the relief that I don't get is to be able to say something to the people challenging me. They get to battle, to discuss, to debate, to argue (if it gets to that) about it. I've had to stand there and take all the blows without looking like I care. I've cried, dammit! I've been very tempted to be a jerk to these people. But that would be below me. That would be putting a "Fuck off and give me my rights" poster up outside their room to see every day.
It won't solve anything and probably escalate the situation. 
So as this bullshit winds on, and it has a long way to go, please make yourself better for it. Put yourself above your taunters and bullies. Prove you can forgive (without forgetting) and please find a way to fight back without violence or unnecessary tactics. Kindness will always defeat them, and will undo anything they can do. Or, if that doesn't work, confuse them with subtle humor and sarcasm.
So, now you know. My own position on this whole debacle is full of difficulties that few are going to experience and even fewer are going to understand. Please, be nice to each other. Don't let a friend voting against you be the end of something. Let it simply be a situation to disagree and move on from. The world will be much more beautiful when we find forgiveness, understanding and compromise. These are the things of Love. If you want to back up your claims of love, follow the path it is a part of.